The Visit
On July 1st Dan and I drove to Pineville, KY and visited Clear Creek Bible Baptist College (CCBBC). The thoughts in my head on the two hour fourty five minute drive were, "no way. This will never happen. I can't leave my job, our family and friends, our home, our lives."
When we arrived at the campus, let me just say I was freaking out, while Dan was falling in love! (Maybe that's why I was freaking out?!?) Dan absolutely loved the campus, the people, the mountains, everything. While I'm thinking... Pineville Kentucky. Population 2000? Number of students on campus 200? Itty bitty hick town where so far every person I've seen in this town has this nasty huge thing of dip in their mouths. For crying out loud I am a California Girl at heart who is all city and Your putting me here of all places, I can bairly stand Shelbyville!!! (Some of that was really my prayer!)
So yep, Dan fell in love with the school and had complete peace about all of it. The thought of moving was just peaceful to him. No doubt. While I am seriously freaking completely out.
At the end of the week, I had to get away and just be with God in prayer. I was able to get away for a couple of hours and was alone with God praying, asking God Why? Why now? Why the heck Pineville? While I was studying I found comfort in the fact that when Jesus called His disciples they couldn't even go back to say their goodbyes. How merciful is God for giving me more than a month to say my goodbyes?! I had to also remember my earnest prayer to Him when I asked for Him to give me a spirit that is willing to give up any and everything for Him and His glory. God quickly put me in my place and made me realize how selfish I had been acting and how my plans are not always His plans. And I had already had this lesson before in life, so it's nothing new to me.
I had to pray for focus. Focus on Him and not wordly things. In the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan (seriously read this book, it's amazing) it talks about how the church should be afraid when we are succeeding more in worldly things then in things for His Kingdom. This brought such conviction about my own career. Yes, God called me to this career without a doubt, but maybe now He's calling me out of it. I really don't understand it, but then again we're told not to lean on our own understanding. I love how one good friend put it. God doesn't shine a spotlight, He only shines a flashlight. We can't see His big picture, so we just have to trust in Him in these steps that lead to His big picture. I'm telling you what, I am so grateful for Erika and allowing God to speak comfort into my life at this time. Erika also helped me realize the possibilities as to why God may be calling us to Pineville. Maybe it's to have more time with our kids and as a family, or maybe it's to save money. Erika had no idea at the time that God recently placed a call in our lives to adopt one day from China and we had been praying about how in the world we were going to save up the money for that. Or how I struggle with the fact that I feel like our lives have gotten so busy that our kids hardly see their mom.
Through my time in prayer and in my conversation with Erika, God finally brought peace to me. The peace that Dan had experienced when we visited the campus.
1 Comments:
Oh Nicole!! This is so profound!! I am so proud of you!!
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home